The Way of a Father

I have been blessed to experience the close presence of two amazing fathers in my life: my own father and my husband. I have learned so many things from both of these men: the value of being strong when times are tough, the importance of hard work, sacrificing for your children and how it feels to know you are safe. Growing up, and to this day I have always considered myself a "Daddy's Girl". Even at a young age I appreciated my Dad's honesty- it was always humbling and maturing to hear what you needed to, versus what you wanted to. My father was concerned more about developing my character than telling me what would let me only feel momentarily happiness. But there were still those moments where he would treat me to special gifts: a date over a small bag of chips and a chocolate milk, a new pink bike with spokes (remember those?), a new animal, especially a baby animal from our farm, a gentle hug, kiss, or a meaningful apology when needed. My father has the hardest exterior, but the softest core. I am very lucky to have grown up with a father who always showed me love and worked very hard to give his family the best he could, which was a lot. My father is a teacher at heart and even now I am restless making a decision unless I can have his advice to guide me. My father is also a man of God. I owe my early interest in having a relationship with God to witnessing my father so involved in our church, the first volunteer to pray at any function, the one who would get his food last so others could get fed, the one who purchased almanacs of sorts to further analyze words in the Bible, and the expectation he placed on us to go to church, every Sunday, even when we would rather sleep in. I love my Dad for many things, but I am most thankful for the way in which he showed me how to love God.

My husband waited through some very difficult times to become a father. During our time of loss, where we just couldn't seem to hold on to our babies, he was a rock. I was a mess- and he was the one who would take care of me, the house, the dog, and keep our lives afloat. I have no doubt that the pain I felt so strongly was shared by him, but he had this amazing ability to keep it more under the surface and only bring it out when he had alone time. I was so excited on the day we found out that our son would be coming to live with us, not just because I would become a mom, but more so because I was eager to see Adam be a Dad. He said to me once that he was worried he may not know how to do it, because his own father had died when he was so young. This sentiment shows not only how much he thought about becoming a dad, but this fear he had about whether he would be a good Dad, meant he would be. Because Adam is always thinking about others before himself. There has not been a day in our marriage, or his time as a Dad, where he made a decision selfishly. One of the main reasons I married Adam is because I knew our children would always feel loved, protected and safe with him, even when I could not fulfill those qualities. When Pierce came into our lives, Adam melted into the experience of loving a child more than himself and differently than the way he loves me. The way he loves our son makes me love him even more than I thought I could. They have this special bond that is such a blessing to see. Pierce loves his Daddy for being fun, funny, and able to match his own energy level. Pierce loves his Daddy because he always wants to play with him, build with legos, eat treats together, or read books (after book...after books...after books...). I watch Adam stare lovingly at Pierce. When he looks at him he does this borderline dorky grin that speaks how grateful he is for him. I love my husband for many things, but I am most thankful for the way in which he takes care of our son.

To all the father's out there who may be reading this. Know that you're job is so very important. Know that you make a great impact on not only your children, but your wives and partners who get to see the way you love your children. You are loved, you are necessary, you are worthy of gratitude. Happy Father's Day to my Father, and my Husband!!!

Fundraising: T-Shirts

In order to bring our child home, we need to fund-raise. One of our fundraising pursuits is selling these awesome T-Shirts designed in collaboration with Fund the Nations. Each T-Shirt is $25 bucks (+ $2 for 2xl, 3xl). To order, please contact me via email at heatherteeter@gmail.com. Thanks so much for your support!

Fundraising: Jewelry

In order to bring our child home, we need to fund-raise. One of our fundraising pursuits is selling these handcrafted necklaces (made by Heather). All necklaces and charms are silver in color and made from zinc alloy, or silver plated materials. All necklaces are $15 minimum (or by donation + shipping, if applicable) and come with a charm of your choice (see pictures below, while supplies last). Another option is to buy the pendant on its own ($10), or as a key-chain ($10).

The Bird Nest Pendant comes with any amount of pearls that you would like (within reason for its size) and the pearls can be pretty much any color that you would like (just let me know what color(s) would prefer). As mentioned, you can choose what charm you would like with the necklace (while supplies last).

The Picture Pendant can hold any picture that you would like, in any color that you would like. If you can send it to me through email, it can likely be put into a pendant. Consider you favorite quote, or a family photo, a map of your favorite place, or you babies footprint: all can be done! As mentioned, you can choose what charm you would like with the necklace (while supplies last).

To order: email heatherteeter@gmail.com and I will be glad to answer any questions you may have, or discuss design options.

Bird Nest Pendant: 

Charms:

Picture Pendant: 

*Alternatively, you can donate to us via our youcaring site:
http://www.youcaring.com/adoption-fundraiser/teeter-family-adoption-fund/314735

A Letter to our Future Child

We are answering the call that has been placed on our hearts and pursuing the adoption of a child who has special needs from Eastern Europe, particularly Ukraine. It is our hope that within the next two years we can bring a child home to our family who would otherwise have difficulty being adopted and would be at risk to be institutionalized, or has already been institutionalized, simply because they have special needs. If you have not read my previous post concerning orphans in Ukraine who have special needs, you can read it here.

Many people would falsely construe a child who is adopted as "lucky", but truthfully it is the other way around. The adoptive parents of that child are the lucky ones for being able to be trusted with the responsibility of raising them. No child deserves to be starved, to be tied to a crib and left for hours, to sit in soiled diapers, to have a lack of stimulation and no knowledge of socializing and playing, to not have the joy of a parent who selflessly loves them. We believe we are lucky to be able to bring this child into our home and we know that we will persevere to provide for their needs in any way that we can.

To our future child,

We love you. I am so sorry that you have had to wait so long for us to find you. It breaks our hearts to think of all the things you have had to endure while waiting for us. To know that you have been hurt, or scared, or sad, or hungry, or anything that is short of happiness is why we will do everything in our power to make sure we can bring you home sooner. We want to meet you, because all we know of you is what has been in our dreams. Do you know how very special you are to us? Do you know that we have waited for you, eagerly? Do you know how much we love you and are so excited for you to be part of our family so that we can hug and kiss you everyday of your life? Do you know that you have a brother who wants to play with you? You are a gift to us- and don't let anyone ever make you feel like you are anything less than someone who is worthy of love and designed perfectly by God.

Soon we will have you in our arms. We have so much work to do on this end before we can come and get you, but know that we will be with you soon. We pray that God gives you that feeling to know we are coming, that there is hope- that He comforts you and protects you all the days of your life until we can add even more happiness to those days.

Sweet child- you are loved. See you soon.

Your family. 

On Being a Mother

Last night my son woke up in the middle of the night, crying. I had only just fallen to sleep, but came out of it pretty quick especially since my being able to sleep at night has almost entirely been replaced with a feeling of restlessness as I wait for him to need me. I went into his room, took hold of him in my arms and sat on the rocking chair that helps lull him into a state of comfort. Almost immediately he went back to sleep. I looked at him while I caressed his cheek: the curve of his nose, the swoop of hair that is his bangs, his full lips which so often bear a welcoming smile, the way his arm curves around my back as I rock him. I start to tear up because for the life of me I still cannot understand how God can love me so much that he would let me be a mother to this sweet boy. I start to pray for him, asking God to bless our boy immensely- to take care of him in the ways that I can't- and to make his life rich with meaningful experiences and for him to feel loved, always. I thank God for bringing him into our lives, for designing a plan that involved us as his parents and for trusting us with his precious life. I kiss his forehead, I gently place him back in his crib, I stroke his cheek one more time and I whisper to him that I love him. I tiptoe back into my room, into my bed and wait to see if he'll need me again that night. A "mommy" follows an hour later and I feel proud- he needs me and I want to be there for him.

Two weeks ago my soon pooped on the floor. I had the brilliant idea of taking off his diaper and letting his "junk" air out. I took my eyes off of him for only seconds (don't all dramatic stories that involve children start with this sentiment?) and he had already managed to poop on the floor, and began wiggling his toes and fingers in it. I yelled for my husband to help, as I often do during times of excrement. We tagged team this situation- he cleaned the poop which had now been painted into the carpet, and I took the feces covered child to the bathroom. He curled his little poop covered legs around me and giggled while he smeared it on to my face: his fingers the brush, the poop his paint, my face his canvas. I turned on the water, gagged through the peeling off of his soiled clothing and breathed a sigh of relief when he finally entered the bubble filled bath, "BUBBLES!" he exclaimed excitedly. I listen to my husband cussing in the background knowing that his job of cleaning the carpets would last much longer than wrangling our child "artist".

Being a mother is accepting that your role is a paradox: In order to experience how wonderful it is to be needed and to be able to want to selflessly give, you must also be occasionally knee dip in crap. Because being a mother is wanting everything that your child can offer you: the hugs, the kisses, the tantrums, the formula spit up on your new blouse (or for those who breast feed- the drippy nipples). Being a mother is relishing in every moment, immersing yourself so far into your child(rens) precious lives that you don't know who you are without them and you don't want to be the person you would be without them, or before you had them.

What a gift it is to be a mother. Being a mother means having the opportunity to know how much God loves us; because although it seems like we can`t love our children more than we already do, He loves us that much more. And this love is unconditional, even during the times when it seems gross, unfathomable, undeserved, or difficult. I was designed to love this child: just like God designed me to be loved by Him. Me being a mother is possible only because God loved me first. How lucky am I?